Dream a little dream

     Lately I’ve been having dreams of the past. They’re not normal dreams, though. During the night my brain or mind or whatever is dragging moments up, even moments that didn’t seem significant enough to remember. The strange part is that it is not from my perspective. It is as though I am seeing myself through how others have seen me. What makes me laugh is that I’ve agreed 100% every single time.

     Having Asperger’s Syndrome, I say or do things that upset others. A vast portion of the syndrome is the inability to read social cues properly. Upsetting others isn’t a constant thing, but I certainly come across as tactless. Unable to recognize the other persons emotion or read the situation my life continues as normal completely unaware of the other persons hurt feelings. If brought up I’d say, “Yeah, I know that I’m an asshole.” But would walk away confused on why and how I was an asshole I missed what happened.

     Everyone that knows me will readily admit that I’m now an entirely new person from back then. Relationships with most people in my life have been improving. It has been so beneficial that lost friendships are being mended, too. While still tactless at times things have improved and my anger is virtually non-existent. So, now I wonder, is it meditation that has opened this type of dreaming? This is really allowing a positive change with people. Does anyone else experience this type of insight?